


Happy For You...

by MetaphoricalPants



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Angst, Best Man, F/M, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Ouch, Post-Squip, Sad Ending, Sad Michael, boyf riends — Freeform, boyfs, everything is sad, post-musical
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-25
Updated: 2017-06-25
Packaged: 2018-11-18 17:58:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11295831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MetaphoricalPants/pseuds/MetaphoricalPants
Summary: Michael's best friend Jeremy Heere is getting married and he wishes he could be happy for him...Or: The one where Jeremy is marrying Christine and Michael is super jealous and wishes he could be with Jerm instead.





	Happy For You...

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is dedicated to my two homeslices who wanted some immense feels. 
> 
> Just a small note, the story takes place after the events of the musical and probably during their junior-senior year of college. Enjoy! 
> 
> Italics are what Jeremy said during the call.

Michael let the phone slip from his hand and fall onto the bed that he had been sitting on the edge of as he spoke to Jeremy over the phone. It had actually happened.. A seemingly innocuous nightmare had become a stark reality, causing his heart to drop to his stomach and his head to spin. He was so nauseous...

_"Michael! Guess what!"_

He could still hear the happiness in Jeremy's voice through the phone. A voice ringing in his head as he tried to process those simple three words that he had dreaded to hear since the fateful day Jeremy had told him he was falling for Christine.

_"She said yes!"_

What had he even said to Jeremy when he was giving him the 'good' news? He could barely remember a blur of, "That's... That's great, buddy.. I-... I'm happy for you.." But he wasn't happy for Jeremy, at all. It was a weak lie, and he knew it. He couldn't force himself to be happy over the one thing that had always made him slowly begin to shut down. He'd already lost Jeremy once when they were in high school..

He remembered vividly feeling of being left all alone creeping into his mind, a chill seeming to fill the room as a sob clawed at his throat, desperate to escape as the floodgates burst. The familiar feeling of wishing he'd offer himself instead, wishing he was never born had begun to creep up on him once again. A feeling he wished he wasn't so familiar with.

_"She's just so perfect, ya know?"_

Michael knew deep down he shouldn't feel this way. His eyes should be brimming with tears of joy for his best friend, not tears of sorrow. But these were certainly caused by sorrow, all because he'd made the tragic mistake of falling in love with his best friend.

Jeremy... The boy who he trusted more than anyone else in the world. They played video games together... They got high in his basement together... They'd been through a hell of a lot together. And all the while, Michael had fallen in love with everything about him through the years. The way his eyes would light up when they would beat a level of their game together. His laugh... His smile.. His messy curls that framed his beautiful face... The love of his life. The person he thought was his soulmate.. Michael felt his heart clench.

Michael couldn't even compare to her. Christine was talented and beautiful... And he was just. Michael. Jeremy's 'buddy,' and nothing more and nothing less, he supposed. And it would always be that way. He could see why Jeremy had chosen her after all... Even if he didn't want to see a reason.

_"I want you to be my best man for the wedding."_

He was no longer half of a pair. Jeremy had replaced him with the one person who Jeremy had always vied for the attention of.. Michael's greatest fear. To be left again.. And after the squipcident, Jeremy had finally got her attention. Michael could've never dreamed it would make it this far though. Maybe he'd been lying to himself all along. Hiding the fact he knew that they would marry and that Jeremy would be happy with her...

Now, he was just being selfish. It was a selfish wish. To truly want to keep Jeremy all to himself. To be the one who was lucky enough to wake up next to him in the morning and fall asleep beside him at night. To be the one to help him through the tears and see him through his best and worst of days. Michael had always been there to do that... But now, that wasn't his place anymore.

Shouldn't he want his best friend to be happy? He was going to be his best man. Wasn't that enough? Shouldn't he be supportive enough to choke down the tears? Here he was, sitting on his bed, his knees now pulled tightly to his chest as he sobbed, glasses crooked on his face. This was the end of their two player game. He'd lost. Christine had come out the victor, taking his spot by Jeremy's side. He was stupid to think Jeremy could ever feel this way for him.

_"Thanks, dude! I'll talk to you later!"_

Yeah... Sure... Michael would talk to him later. He'd sit through listening to Jeremy ramble about how the proposal went. How his heart had practically been beating out of his chest as he waited for Christine to answer. The way his heart fluttered when she said yes...

And though he would seem to be listening, in truth, Michael would be imagining himself in her shoes. As the one Jeremy would propose to. The one Jeremy would love and cherish for the rest of his life. He wouldn't just be the best friend or the buddy... But he guessed maybe things were meant to be this way... Jeremy wasn't meant to be his.

Jeremy deserved someone amazing. Someone just as amazing as he was. Someone funny, understanding, and kind... And that person wasn't Michael. Michael, who couldn't be happy for him. Michael, who couldn't be content with being the best friend. Michael, who wanted to skip his best friend's big day because he was jealous of the bride... He'd been with Jeremy through thick and thin. He couldn't let Jeremy know how much this hurt him. He would just have to grin and bear it. For Jeremy.

And now, he'd get to watch the love of his life get married. He'd watch the way Jeremy smiled as Christine walked down the isle. The way he became emotional during his vows. The way he said I do, as Michael would close his eyes and imagine his own wedding to Jeremy.. A sick thought to have at your best friend's wedding, really.. but he couldn't help himself. As Jeremy kissed Christine, he'd slip out of the chapel, trying to contain his tears until his found a bathroom or made it outside to his car. He would cry until he felt numb, until his head hurt too much to think anymore. He'd go home and end up in the same sad pathetic position he was in now. And all the while, Jeremy would be happy with his new bride. And Michael would put a smile on his face just for him. For Jeremy.

_"Bye!"_

He just kept repeating it to himself. "For Jeremy.."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> I hope you enjoyed the fic!  
> Feel free to drop a comment! They're much appreciated! 
> 
> I'm sorry I wrote this oml it's too sad.


End file.
